activemq has a jmx interface to which you can connect.
this gives us access to messages counting the number of messages in the queue and all kinds of data on memory usage, etc.
http://activemq.apache.org/jmx.html
You have all the details to get you started.
I am very pleased to know what is happening with activemq.
Firing fast from jconsole, and you will be well on your way to figuring out what is happening.
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