Not sure if you can do it remotely as such, but you can "fake" it.
See the MSDN documentation for the Windows Update Agent API , in particular an article titled Finding, Downloading, and Installing Updates . This contains a script that, among other things, lists the updates ready for installation. If you take this bit of the script and change it to write the list to a file instead, you can copy the script to a remote computer, execute the script remotely, and then read the file (and finally delete the file and script from the remote computer for cleaning).
You can execute the script remotely using WMI, see this CodeProject article for more details for this with C #: Create a remote process using WMI in C #
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